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LITERATURE

 » Full Dark, No Stars - Stephen King's new novella questions mankind's ability to trust others.
[02.21.2011 by Bridget Doyle]

MUSIC

 » The Top 30 Albums of 2010 - Fashionably, fabulously late, our favorite music (and believe me, there was a LOT) of 2010, the year that some have called the best year for music ever. And only some of those fools work here. Plenty of usual suspects, lots of ties and a few surprises that I won't spoil, including our unexpected #1.
[12.24.2010 by The LAS Staff]

MUSIC

 » Live: Surfer Blood/The Drums at Lincoln Hall, Chicago, IL - Remember when Weezer used to put together records that you could sing along to and rock out to? That's what Surfer Blood's show was like!
[11.04.2010 by Cory Tendering]

Music Reviews

Screaming Females - Castle Talk
»Screaming Females
Castle Talk
Don Giovanni
Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross - The Social Network [Original Soundtrack]
»Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross
The Social Network [Original Soundtrack]
The Null Corporation
Deerhunter - Halcyon Digest
»Deerhunter
Halcyon Digest
4AD
No Age - Everything in Between
»No Age
Everything in Between
Sub Pop
Robyn - Body Talk Pt. 1/ Body Talk Pt. 2
»Robyn
Body Talk Pt. 1/ Body Talk Pt. 2
Konichiwa
The Walkmen - Lisbon
»The Walkmen
Lisbon
Fat Possum
Cherish
Unappreciated
Capitol

Rating: 7/10 ?


August 4, 2006
Rank insanity, all this hip-hop verisimilitude. Not only that, but there's got to come a point where the world at large tires of all the gangster stuff en masse and just stops buying it unless it's one artist without all the shout-outs.

In my view, you see - not that I'd bother typing anyone else's - most rap records rely too much on guest shots, as though each artist were afraid to table something without some tacit stamp of approval. And the dilution factor increases ten-fold when all an artist has to do is buttonhole the right homeys to record a few mumbled abba-dabba nonsense rhymes and watch it go gold.

Can't last forever though. Us 80s kids are plenty embarrassed by our past fascination with legwarmers, Aquanet and movie characters named Ducky, but can you just fucking picture what it'll be like for the honkies of Generation Zzz, never mind having to spend whatever's left of their paychecks after helping pay off The Great Bush Bankruptcy of America on tattoo removal?

Will they still be verbally masturbating in bizzlespeak? Can you even wait to see them trying to freak-dance when they're pushing 300 pounds?

All right, fine, the non-old have it good right now. But payback's a mudder, by cracky.

But the everlovin Lost at Sea isn't my personal blog, so let's piss off and toss this Cherish thing under the scope.

(Deep breath)

Giving mad props to sactascular honeys who don't feel cadillacin playaz frontin with wack grillz, for real - two times - the four babe-siblings of Cherish have herewith submitted a tuneful joker in the deck just in time for the Beyonce and LeToya war-what-war. Saucy little ghetto confections that they are, these toaster-ready snap-dance symphonies won't have your soccer mom buggin enough to interrupt your nail-polish-huffing party, and yo, you can even tell your pesky little sister it's Destiny's Child and she'll be all up in the muthafugga.

But wait, future Bridezillas, there's more. This lively laserdisc figuratively bursts with illustrative lyrical parables certain to aid in augmenting your social position as a human conundrum: one minute (the eponymous cut, number four) Hoodied Boyfriend forgot your anniversary and exhibits a roguish misconception of monogamy, the next ("Taken") you're the one be down with OPP. Melting glaciers and overstocked Baghdad morgues got you glumly goggling your hair straightener? Work that lacadonkadonk perspicaciously, girlfriend!

Reviewed by Eric Saeger
An LAS staff writer based in New Hampshire, Eric Saeger was named alt.flame\'s Newbie of the Year in 2000.

See other reviews by Eric Saeger

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